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This is me dusting off my soapbox for a bloody good rant.

In fact this is me with such a bug up my ass that I got out of a nice warm bed, beside a nice warm baby because I couldn't sleep.

Over the last few years I have noticed a slow creep of what I can only describe as "the fear" amongst bloggers - and yes I am talking about female bloggers here - who have become so delicate that it is now unacceptable to voice even the most respectful disagreement.

And the problem is getting worse. In fact it has turned a corner and is heading down hill at speed with rollerskates and a feckin jet pack.

And we're not talking minor league bloggers here, we're talking the big guns, the many thousand followers, invited to become keynote speakers at conferences bloggers.

In the last year I have been flamed three times when commenting on posts:

The first time I was actually trying to sympathise with a difficult time this blogger had posted about. I was told in no uncertain terms by the lady herself that I had missed the point and actually sympathy wasn't what she was after.

No? Did you air your shit on the internet as a public service announcement then because I tell you what, nobody is learning from it. Not even you.

The second time I had the temerity to raise an eyebrow at a blogger who has advocated passionately for women for several years because she posted about how much she was enjoying listening to Robin Thicke's recent "classic".

I had barely hit enter before me, and several others, were engulfed in the wave of "support" telling us a) we didn't "get it" b) she was allowed to listen to whatever she wanted and c) don't you know that song's about his wife anyway?

That may all be true, but we didn't call her out as a murdered of puppies, we expressed surprise that a song like that would be on the play list of a feminist.

And this evening, seriously just the icing on the cake this evening.

There was a post shared by a blogger I respect about this new life saving baby cot in India. I had an instant reaction to the article and mulled over whether I was just going to open a can of whoopass on myself by posting it, but hey, social media is all about the interactive experience and the ability to connect and grow right?

No, apparently social media is just about kissing ass these days.

My carefully worded question around whether this cot was trying to fix a problem that actually didn't exist was, I am informed, missing the point.

Apparently life in southern India isn't like my first world bubble.

No shit Sherlock. But the fact that you have replied to me in nearly real time says to me that you aren't exactly living in a shanty town.

And before anyone points out that since I am not a successful blogger I can't possibly understand the pressures these people are under, I KNOW, and I fully agree.

Except for two things:

1. It's your choice to put yourself out there into public view
2. Respectful disagreement is not the same thing as being attacked by trolls.

Healthy discourse is the tool human beings have developed over centuries to stop you looking like a complete ass. It's the thing we humans do so that we don't end up with more Emperors in New Clothes.

Except somewhere along the line, women in the blogging world, and especially those who blog about parenting choices - actually anyone who comments on parenting full stop - has taken a collective step back into their own personal bubble and cries foul any time anyone doesn't kiss their feet for every word they pronounce.

I hope someone does come on here and tell me I'm talking crap. In fact I live in hope of that every time I post because then at least people will be thinking for themselves and challenging me to think more deeply about what I believe.

As hated a term as the "Mummy Wars" has become, what this trend really says to me is that it has taken a more insidious turn than ever before. Like any abuser worth his salt will tell you, if you do a proper job pretty soon your victim will believe in your hatred and take it on as their own.

Welcome to the new era of parental discourse people - now with added neurosis.

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